Dear Customer,

I understand that you do not care.

I understand that when you walk into the store, you do not think to use the handle on the doors, because there is so much glass and why should you give it a thought in the first place? I understand that you do not realize you leave your fingerprints all over it and that they are actually very easy to see and look pretty disgusting. I understand that you do not recognize your part in it when you later blame me for the messy doors and windows in the store.

I understand that you do not like to wait for me to finish whatever I am doing to turn my attention to you, even if I am looking in the opposite direction and am obviously busy with something. I understand that you do not trust me to make reasonable choices when prioritizing. I understand that you know better, even if I am the one who deals with such situations all day long.

I understand that you never really have any idea what you want. I understand that you are used to Starbucks lingo, and thus expect me to be aware that “tall” means “small,” “grande” stands for “medium/regular,” and “venti” is “large.” I even understand that you could not be bothered to read the actual menu before ordering a “frappuccino,” while simultaneously practically mispronouncing it as “cappuccino,” only to later complain about getting the wrong drink, after you refused to listen to me repeat your order or check your receipt.

I understand that you want to unload all your change on me, even if it is $0.95 and in pennies. I understand that you do not want to wait for the confirmation that your credit/debit card has been authorized and that you somehow get ahead when you walk away before I can verify that you have actually paid for your order. I understand that the end of the bar is a much more comforting place than the front of the register. I also understand that you cannot afford to tip me, even though you did not even pay attention to how much your total really was prior to nonchalantly telling me to toss out the receipt.

I understand that you cannot keep track of the order of drinks I am making. I understand that you cannot even remember the person whose order I took just before yours, and I understand that you cannot possibly realize that I should probably make their drink first. I understand that you feel the need to watch as I make your drink and demand that I verbally confirm every single detail, even though you ordered a basic drink with no customizations. I also understand that taking a quick look around to store is too difficult, and that the 6-foot condiment bar right in the center of the biggest window, underneath the huge Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf sign is tiny, and that asking me to point it out is much more convenient.

I understand that your specific seating needs are more important than anything else, including (but not limited to) seating of other customers and reasonable room for both customers and us to walk around. I understand that this sometimes means that you have to take all of our chairs outside, arrange them around one table, and leave them there, covered in plates, silverware, cups, trash, and even cigarette butts. I understand how passing two trash bins on your way out of the store does not trigger a reflex to throw your trash out yourself. I understand that it is my job to do that for you, or perhaps the next customer’s.

I understand that you feel no need to put effort towards keeping the restrooms decent. I understand that toilet paper all over the floor fondly reminds you of your own home and that it contributes to you feeling like you are indeed at home. I understand that an overflowing trash can is a sign that you should throw away used paper towels around it, rather than using one in/outside the store and/or notifying me. I understand that splashing water all over the mirror is a necessity. I also understand that the toilet seat is often hard to miss, and that you are most certainly not the one who should be cleaning up that mess. I also understand that just covering it with toilet paper is an acceptable way of contributing to that task.

But I do not understand how you can not flush.

Sincerely,
Your Favorite Coffee Bean Barista

This entry was posted on Friday, October 19th, 2007 at 8:36 pm and is filed under people, rants.